Which horses have the smallest legs? The smallest horses.
If you say ‘MY COCAINE’ you are also saying ‘Michael Caine’ in his own voice.
People would laugh when I told them I wanted to be a comedian, well they’re not laughing now.
I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying.
Have you heard about the evil group of men who control all the world’s cheese – The hallouminati.
Why don’t you ever see hippopotamus hiding in trees? Because they’re really good at it.
What’s the best part about living in Switzerland? Not sure, but the flag is a big plus.
I wrote a song about a tortilla, well actually it was more of a wrap.
Some people appear bright until you hear them speak, this is because light travels faster than sound.
I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.
You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
“I don’t like country music but I wouldn’t denigrate those who do. And for those who are into it, denigrate means to ‘put down’.
In the park the other day I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me.
I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said “I can’t complain.”
My wife told me to stop impersonating flamingos. so I had to put my foot down.
Say what you want about deaf people. . .
A magician was driving down the road – then he turned into a drive way.
Did you know the ‘shinbone’ is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
I was on the lookout for some camouflage trousers today, but I couldn’t find any.
I’d like to have more self-esteem, but I just don’t deserve it.
What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef.
What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? Damn!
I used to get on with the neighbours, until they put a password on their Wi-Fi.
I’m learning the hokey cokey. Not all of it, just the ins and outs.
There are two rules for success: 1) Don’t disclose all that you know.
A Freudian slip is when you mean one thing and say your mother.
Why do golfers wear two pairs of trousers? In case they get a hole in one.
Which horses have the smallest legs? The smallest horses.

Can you guess the nice words ?

1. BOO_S
2. T_TS
3. _ _ NDOM
4. F_ _ K
5. P_N_S
6. _OCK
7. PU_ S_
8. S_X

Answers:
answers: 1.books, 2.tots, 3.random, 4.fork, 5.pants, 6.sock, 7.pulse, 8.six
Did you get them all -great!

1. When the prosecutor approaches the jury box, attempt to give him your drink order.

2. When items are held up to be entered as evidence, shout out a bid.

3. Snigger loudly when witnesses swear to tell the truth.

4. Wear an mp3 player headset.

5. Raise your arm when the prosecutor asks questions like you know the answer.

6. After an hour take your shoes off and place your socks on a radiator.

7. Ask the judge intermittently how long left.

8. Ask the judge if he can hang on while you take a piss.

9. Ask the other jurors to wake you up when the gory details start.

10. Ask the judge if you can borrow his gavel to tap in a loose nail on your seat.

Can you guess the nice words ?

1. BOO_S
2. T_TS
3. _ _ NDOM
4. F_ _ K
5. P_N_S
6. _OCK
7. PU_ S_
8. S_X

Answers:
answers: 1.books, 2.tots, 3.random, 4.fork, 5.pants, 6.sock, 7.pulse, 8.six
Did you get them all -great!

1. When the prosecutor approaches the jury box, attempt to give him your drink order.

2. When items are held up to be entered as evidence, shout out a bid.

3. Snigger loudly when witnesses swear to tell the truth.

4. Wear an mp3 player headset.

5. Raise your arm when the prosecutor asks questions like you know the answer.

6. After an hour take your shoes off and place your socks on a radiator.

7. Ask the judge intermittently how long left.

8. Ask the judge if he can hang on while you take a piss.

9. Ask the other jurors to wake you up when the gory details start.

10. Ask the judge if you can borrow his gavel to tap in a loose nail on your seat.

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